this is some funny shit. I miss this show! :)
(Source: doilooklikeajulie, via d-d-u-u-b-b-s-t-e-p)
So I borrowed my grandmother’s treadmill, don’t know for how long. she doesn’t use it anyways… But I am on my third day of my ten minute workouts I am doing two straight weeks on level two since level one is so simple. Then every two weeks I will take it up a notch, and by the end of summer I hope I loose some weight, which I will! :D I’ve already lost 4 pounds in two days. So hopefully this weight thing works out for me. I’ve always been a person to be really self-conscious and to comfort that I would just eat. I am determined to loose some weight this summer. :)
Just really have been having a good weekend. Had a girls weekend out pretty much. :) its been really nice to worry about myself. Haven’t done that in a while. I really am excited about this college that I might be accepted to, its called mary baldwin. :) I’m about to go into work but I just wanted to write a little something. :) duces. <3 ericka. :)
At school and I just felt like just putting some of my feelings, etc. On here. :)
I work today. Had off yesterday which it was a pretty chill day. :) I hope when I get my check it is a pretty good one. I feel like I have been working crazy hours lately so I should be getting my hours for school by the deadline so I’m not flipping out about that one at all. I wanted to be comfy today so I am wearing some pj’s to school. :) well time to go in to school and be really bored for like two and a half hours. Oh how lovely that will be. Lol well until next time. :D
So I guess Andrew the roommate and (ex??)best friend is moving out. I’m really frustrated but at the same time I really can’t change the way people feel or change situations. I can’t be in the middle of these situations anymore… I am going to school and I am working and things are pretty good. Just tired all the time. Just cleaned my room so at least that is taken care of. lol. I’m really mad that my whole family has basically left me in the dust… My dad is in south Carolina, my grandfather is in like Virginia or something and now my mom left to Virginia. Without even telling me at all……..lovely. I feel like this tumblr venting is working for me and I love venting. I think that having an internet journal is better than a paper journal because sometimes I just don’t feel like writing everday. lol. I really love this Miranda cosgrove song, Dancing crazy! lol It’s really catchy! :) So this journal entry is my way of saying this is the new me.
:D
cheers to living life and the new me.
the one who doesn’t really care what you think, and btw. Deal with your own problems because I have my own to deal with! :)
except if you are my family then I will defiantly listen. :) lol.
DUCES!
December 22, 2009
Current mood:
ashamed
I hate my sister i dont know if i can forgive her or not. i really just dont want anything to do with her……. I can’t stand her anyways. I really am not happy with myself i want to look in the mirror and just be pretty I want to feel beautiful. all i do is fucking eat 24/7 i dont know why i cant stand it UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I just want to just go away for a little bit. things aren’t very good for me right now. i feel like i want to go and just fly away fly like a bird. I really hate my sister i have so much anger for people and its like if i just get it out but i think im just making excuses for reasons why i weigh so much… i think thats it. i just want to be thin. i just want someone to like me….i want to be healthy. ugh i hate my life… FUCK EVERYONEEEEEE.
november 25, 2009 =>
♥Wiehe
Dear Diary,
So last night I hung out with Clinton. just as friends. chilled in the barn & just chatted. Then laura came over and I completely forgot about the key in the back so we went through a bunch of shit just to get in the house! it was crazy. but then we got in the house. So I found out with Amanda was fucking ben when I was dating him. This is the last time I will be talking about it, I had a dream last night about him but I have moved on otherwise and my sister on the other hand I am very mad and obviously she has alot to prove to me and I guess family doesn’t mean that much to her. I would never do that to her. well right now laura is over but she is sleeping. I have work at 4 to 9. I was really sick yesterday, so I just made sure I turned in all of my work and came home to rest. I had a cup of coffee for breakfast. I’ve made this southwest salad which is awesome. It tastes just like the southwest salad at work. So now it will give me a chance to make healthier choices. In order to be more healthier I must work out so I’m going to start working out before I get ready for work, then I can take a shower and get dressed. I got my government paper back I got a 20/18 which is awesome I got the best grade on my project. I am really excited about it. I’m really just trying to make sure that I have everything in school set up and make sure I get everything done. I am also trying to make sure that I am cleaning my room and not making any messes so I don’t have to worry about it. I am trying to make sure I have a wonderful social part of life, physical and mental. I really am trying to worry about myself. I have been having alot of stress lately so I guess thats why I have been having alot of dreams. At least there is a way I can relive the stress without really knowing it. well I guess thats all I have for now. I am just watching the history channel. then I am going to make a salad & then clean & junk so ,peacepunchcaptaincrunch. :)
nov 22 , 2009
Current mood:
tired
dear diary,so today was a good day. I went to see new moon with felicity. I had a dream last night about ben and I didn’t want to be with him. he tried to kiss me in the dream but I pulled away. I am glad that I am over him finally. I really want a boyfriend at this point but i’m not sure who. I have not spotted out a guy i’m head over heals with yet in school. I am focusing on school and work right now but it would be nice to have someone to share my experiences with. I just got off work right now and I am going to clean, take a shower and then probably do a few surveys on Myspace and just kinda chill. I only have school tomorrow & Tuesday. how exciting is that. :) well until next time. peacepunchcaptaincrunch. :)
♥wiehe.
september 9 2009thinking about you right now.
just remembering the good times.
&& the stories to told me.
&& how you kept everyone together.
I miss you so much.
you were one of the people who
was always there for me.
no matter what.
you were an amazing person.
&& I still think about you.
every single day.
since that day.
i♥you.
I wish i could see you again.
truthfully.
I miss the good days.
chill under the porch.
listen to you just talk.
the poems you wrote.
they were amazing.
the things that were in your mind.
I can’t believe its been a year already.
soon it will have been 2 years.
the only thing i have is memories.
you don’t know how much you affected my life.
I was hoping you got better.
but you never did…
but you are better now daddy.
I call you my father.
because i always respected you like one.
I can’t wait to see you again.
one day.
one day.
one day.
but until then.
all i have are my dreams.
I MISS YOU SO MUCH DAD!!!!!
MR. JAY!!!!!
rip.
9.8.55 to 5.4.08
you will never be forgotten.
i love you.
&& miss you.
August 30, 2009so things arent going as planned. kyle and i are on a break. i hate the male human race right now….his dad is being an asshole and i really care about kyle and i want to be his girlfriend…..i hope he realizes how much i care. I want to visti SC in winter to see my father and oliver my feelings for him are coming back and i kinda miss him for some reason. i am stressed out majorlly i want a car and the way things are looking hopefully my phone bill wont be 217$ anymore. i will be really frustrated if it is again. im really tired but the thoughts in my mind wont go away it’s keeping me up. I hate being alone. i don’t like the feeling of being alone in the world it makes me feel unloved and lost. I am going to stay at my moms house tomorrow night after school. I am very tired i think im going to head to bed after i finish downloading the beatles to my ipod. i stayed at felicitys last night so im obsessed with across the universe. well goodnight. ill write again tomorrow while im at my moms hopefully tomorrow i feel better.
Feb 19, 2009
so yeah. my life is purrty much pretty cool right now. even though I got into a fight with Chelsea today. She defiantly made my cheek hurt we both got our swing’s at each other and that all I am going to say about that. So don’t ask me anymore about it. Her and I are friends still yes, and the fight was just a immature mistake that we both made. I am suspended from school for 5 days but I’m gonna have some fun, I’m not grounded so that is always good. && I can finally get some sleep!!!!! I haven’t been able to but I definatly am happy about not having to go to school, hopefully this doesn’t effect my grade in some of my classes because it definatly will if the school let’s it. I am sitting at home just bored out of my mind at this point. I am purrty sure that people are going to want to ask what happend today but I would definatly rather not talk about it so yeah just ignore the fact that it happend today that would be great.
So yeah if you want to chill sometime in the next week definatly hit me up. yay.
This love is stronger then a thousand storms.
This love can withstand a million thorns.
This love can last, forever and a day.
This love can last, until our dreams fade away.
This love will show passion more then enough.
This love will push on through, when times get tough.
This love is a posion, more addictive then a drug.
This love can kill you faster then a simple screw up.
This love is as true as it could ever be.
This love makes me hope one day you will marry me.….
.. ..
.. ..
Sunday, October 26, 2008 ….
.. ..
Monday, December 22, 2008 ….
.. ..
Monday, January 19, 2009 ….
.. ..
.. ..
1. :)
Current mood: bored
Category:Life….
so today started off well. in a good mood. yesterday things did not go according to plan but that is ok. :) so laura is stuffing her face with chow main and we are watching a movie. i guess i should use my blog since i have one. doubt anyone will actually take the time to read whats going on in my life but its w.e. so i am really frustrated right now i have like no money at all im two dollars from paying my bill and i have no money for anything. it really is not a good feeling. i was hoping to get my tattoo this weekend but since i have no money i cant get it. i am going to work at 4. at least i will get paid in two weeks. and hopefully i will hangout with kyle next weekend gosh hes the sweetest. :)
….
life.in general.
Category:Life….
sometimes when you feel like giving up and you have nothing else to live for, love will always come through for you. It is the best feeling in the world to know that the one person in your life can make you feel like your on top of the world. I absolutely wish that I could change things for other people. I want to make sure people find the love that I have. I want my friends to be happy. Lately i’ve been distant from alot of people and I feel really bad about it. I want all of my friends to knoe that I think you all are amazing. You are my life support and I don’t know what I would do without you all. I hope I can make the best out of my goodness to make every single one of my friends as happy and in love as I am…..
….
dreams really do come true…..
So I am just going to write from the heart, For the past two months everything that I ever thought was love has been changed to a different perspective. I thought love was about being taken out, movies, dinner, money, and lust, Having that name of being With someone. Love is nowhere near what I thought it was, I finally have found out what love is and it is the most amazing feeling in the world.. Love is when you get goosebumps every time you think about that person. When you can’t stand to be away from them. When you have to leave them for a certain amount of time and you cry because you cannot feel there touch, or kiss until the next time you see them, if you can see them again. The feelings that I feel for Oliver Benjamin Greene are so unexplainable, I can’t even put them into words. He makes me feel so special, like were the only people in the world and I have no worries in the world. He relieves all of my stress, and lifts a million things off my shoulders. He is so fun to be around, he acts just like me and we always find some kind of fun to get into when we are around each other. I love to see him smile, it is so wonderful. Ben is the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me. His hugs make me feel so safe and warm. His kiss is so soft and loving. The way he looks at me is so unreal, there isn’t and explanation. In simpler terms, Oliver Benjamin Greene is the love of my life and I plan to spend the rest of my life with him.
I love O.B.G.
10.18.08….
….
sweetest thing…..
Ben said this to me and I thought it was the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me. “I love yo more than any amount of words can ever describe. What makes me wake up in the morning is not the glow of the rising sun, but instead the soft glow of your beautiful brown eyes lit by the sunlight. What makes me go to sleep is not the moon and the stars in the sky, but the moonlight’s glow on your face. You are my sun, my moon, my stars, and my sky. There is nobody else in the world like you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” I love you Oliver Benjamin Greene….
VIDEO #3
Omg. these are from like 2008 when I lived in South Carolina. It’s crazy how much I have changed since then. :)
VIDEO #2
Omg. these are from like 2008 when I lived in South Carolina. It’s crazy how much I have changed since then. :)
VIDEO #1
Omg. these are from like 2008 when I lived in South Carolina. It’s crazy how much I have changed since then. :)
Born This Way.
Gaga
On the floor. :)
J-lo. :)
I feel like I want things to work out for the best. I’m feeling him. I want to be around him. I would do anything for him. yet, I’m still unsure about the whole thing. I wish I didn’t have to have guilt in my mind. but I do. It’s hard to find someone to catch you when you fall. Life is all about making mistakes and learning from them, and I know moving this fast doesn’t seem like the best thing, and my feelings get in the way of my brain trying to tell me better advice than my heart gives but I really feel so much attached to him. things happen for a reason and sometimes you have to let go of things to allow new things to come along. but him, I don’t want to let him go.
Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you I had no control over.
So now that I have vented a little,
I have found a room for rent for 500$ and I think that I could handle it. come July first I might be moving in there. I have been just working alot lately and it’s taking a toll on my body. I’m so tired all the time recently and it’s not really that great. I mean it’s money so I guess I can’t really complain. I am going to just write some more a different day. I really just needed to vent. :/
My Senior Picture of 2011. :) I hoped to graduate last year 2010 but I was not able to because I was not given classes I was required to have in order to graduate when I was suppose to. Oh well I will still walk across the stage. :)